Thursday, July 27, 2006
Commitment Phobia: It's Not Just The Men Anymore
The Affair-Proof Marriage, I did a little searching and uncovered a wide range of related material. In particular an article from the Discovery Health Channel caught my eye.
Tradition holds that men tend to have a harder time committing to relationships, while women are supposed to be the ones yearning to land a guy and drag him kicking and screaming to the alter. Apparently, though, this is no longer the case. According to relationship counselor and author Audrey Chapman, the changing role of women in our society has led to a state where both men and women are equally likely to exhibit what is referred to as commitment phobia.
The word 'phobia' refers to a fear, and that is exactly what people with this problem feel when it comes to relationships. The fear can spring from any number of sources. Some people grow up without ever seeing any of their family members commit to successful relationships. Others have negative experiences in relationships of their own, which leads them to expect a similar ordeal whenever they become involved with someone new. Whatever the reason, such people usually find ways to sabotage their relationships, sometimes before they truly begin.
Being without a relationship doesn't mean you are phobic of commitment. Relationships can encounter difficulties for a wide variety of reasons and some people are simply happy without a partner.
Chapman goes so far as to identify four types of commitment-phobic women. Do you have a history of failed relationships? If so, you might be a Pity Party-Goer, Boomerang, Detective or Picky Picker ... or none of the above. Check out the article to find out if any of these categories shed some light on your relationship patterns.