Saturday, October 07, 2006

Ask the Faithful Readers #9: Weapons of Mass Seduction

Dear Faithful Reader,

Many people spend considerable chunks of time away from their significant other. Consultants, sales people, airline personnel, and many others travel constantly because of their jobs. Married students attend separate campuses. The reasons for physical separation are endless.

One of the issues, of course, is missing the physical intimacy that is only possible when you are together. Or is that the only way it's possible?

This article by CBC News reports on new product called the Sinulator, which some members of the military (among others) are apparently using to keep the home fires burning. This device gives a whole new meaning to the phrase, "reach out and touch someone." Billed as the world's first internet-controllable sex toy, the Sinulator allows a soldier in Iraq to have an intimate interlude with his wife in New York. (Well, you be the judge of whether you consider it to be intimate.) The soldier simply uses a normal Internet computer, while the partner at home uses a computer-controllable handheld device.

Where might this be headed in the future? Imagine two people on opposite ends of an Internet connection, both wearing black lycra body suits interlaced with computer-controllable sensors that can simulate human touch. (To my knowledge, this type of suit has not yet been invented.) Add in 3D goggles and a headset and you could see, hear and feel your partner's movements from afar.

What do you think? Are we on the verge of re-defining the bounds of intimacy? Can you see such products ever being accepted as mainstream? Or is this sort of thing likely to always be considered too "out there" for most people?

I will post my personal favorite comment next Saturday with a link to the respondent's blog.

Signed, The Inquiring Advice Guy

(Oh, and check back tomorrow everyone; my online interview will be available.)


  1. It will be too out there. People might try it, but it will never be considered 'normal'. Except for freaks who try to justify it and then expect everyone else to accept them, to the point where it'll be considered discrimination to insult the cyberlove lifestyle.

    It won't be worth the expense. Maybe in a long time, we'll have virtual reality (that used to be popular!) zones, which will be normal. But use of it for intimate encounters will be seen by the general public as disgusting like pornography.

    Just a prediction. I think I would've preferred not knowing about this technology.

  2. Hi Andrew!

    First of all, nothing is too "out there" anymore. Haven't you seen "Nip/Tuck"?!

    Second, I certainly hope that the soldiers are wearing condoms when they use the suit. Blecchh! Imagine sharing that thing?!?

    Third, I guess "Sleeper" wasn't too far off, huh?

    I think most soldiers will prefer to satisfy themselves the "old-fashioned" way--you know, a bathroom, a Playboy magazine, and well, use your imagination! I'm sure they'd rather cut to the chase than to waste time putting on a smelly suit.

    Have a great weekend!


  3. Shan: You may have coined a new term: "the cyberlove lifestyle."

    Lisa: The suit is just my future "what if" scenario. The current technology is only the handheld variety.

  4. Oh...that just makes me feel so teenaged son would never leave his room!

  5. Oh sure, blame ME.

  6. It is just a matter of time I think.
    Probably it is the natural way of having sex that will be considered unhealthy and unsafe.

  7. Good God I hope this is never considered normal.

  8. Anonymous10:18 AM

    I'm with pj.

    I think they got the name right. sin u lator.

    That isn't real intimacy or anything close to it.

  9. Hmmm. Well as someone who only sees their husband once every six months or so... I would have to say I wouldn't do it. I am fairly sure he would list this as "haram" anyway.

    I don't think it would be too "out there" but I imagine it would eventually become more relegated to the "place" in society that sex toys sit in now... and just join them. Not every American has one (or more), and they are still mildly shocking in a sense-- like you aren't going to just pull a toy out and slap it down on your mother's kitchen table... usually... I think also it has to do with privacy. We tend to keep this stuff slightly more private than what you ate last night or where you went, and I have a feeling this would be the same way.

    So? No, I don't see it becoming mainstream because most people will likely continue in the tried and true fashion of up close and personal. For those who live in seperation, like me, you'll eventually realize it's not touch that makes intimacy. It's minds and emotions coming together and learning to verbally connect and reach your partner emotionally. Few people would tell you that physical touch makes intimacy over emotional bonding if they really thought about it. Yeah, I miss his touch more than anything... but his touch only means something to me because of the emotional and intellectual bonds we share. Otherwise , it wouldn't be any different than any other male I see every day.

  10. What’s real is real and what’s not is not.
    You can do lots of things on line now days including to help induce your partner to an orgasm from hundreds of miles away but it’s still not the same thing as the real thing.
    You are not touching your partner, they are touching themselves and whispering in their ear is not the same as feeling the heat come off their body or experiencing the feeling of being wanted you get from someone next to you.

    This reminds me of two movies, Sleeper with Woody Allen and Demolition Man with Sylvester Stallone.
    Both these movies had devices that enhanced and simulated sex but even though both people were present in the room they did the
    play station sex rather than the real physical fluid swapping kind because it was considered more fun and in one case more sterile.
    I can see id becoming addictive to many people.
    We just may be in danger of loosing physical intimacy as technology advances.
    This would also brings up infidelity issues.
    If it does become easy as a game, then is using it with other people cheating or not?
    Personally I think for the short term and as a sexual stress releaver it’s not such a bad idea but as the song says, “There is nothing like the real thing baby”.

  11. Where does one get this thing? Mmmmmmm?????

    I would imagine that this would be a boon to the housing situation. Just think about all the people you know who have a great sex life but can't stand being around one another all the time. Now they could live seperately and still enjoy the best part about their relationship.


  12. My husband and I bought his/her vibrating underwear that come with two alternate remote controls that you can attach to your keyring. Looks just like a car key remote.

    Cyber or Phone sex are a gateway to more terrible and uncooth kinky activities. Before you know it you'll both be hooked on having secret public sex!!

    The next time you run into an elderly couple grocery shopping together - chances are high they also have on this vibrating undie set.

    Trust me, it is better to stick with simple sex, missionary style and keep a sheet between you. Anything else will mean we've let romantic love escape the confines of the bedroom!

  13. Interesting subject, but I don't think it is something I would be into...then again WTF, I have been in that 'away from home for months at a time' and sex is sex.

    Yes, the good old 'self love' method is fine, and the cyber, cam and phone sex are great ways to relief built up pressures, but to make LOVE you do need the physical contact.

    Don't get me wrong, I have had mind blowing orgasms on the end of a phone or internet connection, but I feel cheap afterwards, if I have never had physical sex with that person before. If it is a follow up to physical sex, then I don't have a problem if you are seperated by distance; you know where to touch, the spots that make her ooh and ahh, you know the feeling of her body against yours.

    Nothing compares to the real thing, love making needs to be stimulated by the senses - the FEEL of your lovers body, the SCENT of her during and after sex, the SIGHT of her body and her expressions when making love especially during orgasm, the TASTE of her (we will leave that to the imagination) and the SOUND of her ohhs and ahhs or cries of passion during the act.

    SEX is one thing but MAKING LOVE with your partner is another.

  14. Anonymous10:15 PM

    Whats the big deal?..If it works for the military guys, so what? It is better than having your husband over there making babies that get left behind when they come home. Babies that have no fathers. What goes on in a marriage is noones business. If this helps keep those fires burning while he is away then good for them.

  15. I don't believe you can replace intimacy with something like this. If you are talking pure sex and fun - great toy, tell me where to sign up. However, intimacy is hearing your partners voice on the phone. Their words travel your body and make you feel them deeply. They can simply whisper or take a deep breah that can cause you to open yourself physically as if they are right above you. I want to hear his voice guiding my fingers and holding me there.....until...

  16. I have been in and out of this particular post so many times now. I had written a comment and realised it was almost a novel...then I deleted it lol

    It's an interesting topic for sure, and one I may have to put on my own site with a link to this post, if that's ok with you of course.

    So basically I'm just saying "Hi, fascinating article on CBC, need more time to think about it" lol

  17. I dont agree with it. When my husband was in Viet Nam if I had had this thing I would not have used it. Im no prude, but this just doesnt sit well with me. Its very un-natural. When your husband is away, you wait till he comes home and you hope he does the same. If you cant forego the sex act while he is off fighting a war then your one hot tamale. Sex is supposed to be intimacy, touching, and pleasure. That thing is just plain old masturbation with someone watching you. Aint nothin like the real thing baby.